KGB

The real KGB might knock your lights out if you look at them funny. The strain isn’t great for your wakefulness either, but at least you have the freedom to choose whether it’s a punishment or a blessing. You’ll be ravenously hungry before you’ve lapsed into a loopy stupor on a KGB high. With the right preparation, KGB can render you immovable and pleased, dropping off your headaches, stress, and pain while you go.

The flavor of KGB thankfully wreaks of the outdoors rather than the government offices. The floral, herbal tones combine spiciness and fresh fragrances to create a taste that’s nostalgic-delicious. On the exhale – wood and herbs fill the air and heal your anxieties.

Novice growers love KGB when they can get their hands on it. The Vancouver Island Seed Company bred KGB to be easy for beginning growers to manage in most growing conditions and with most techniques. No matter what you do to the KGB, it adapts to survive and thrive. It’s nearly evenly matched in Indica vs Sativa (60/40) but favors a strong body high.

Did the KGB ever use laughter to torture enemy informants? Tickle torture? The KGB strain causes giggling and belly laughs almost as soon as you start to feel the high creeping in. Tingling comes next, and a deep sense of ease. You’ll be relaxed by laughter and it’ll make you laugh even more.

You have to be prepared for the KGB high. It’ll leave you locked and immovable on your couch, heavy, giggling, and relaxed. No sooner than you’ve settled into your temporary new home, you’ll start to feel uncontrollable hungry urges. Ready to snack and laugh the evening away, you’ll be scarfing down anything you can eat. We don’t recommend KGB for people hoping to lose weight, but we downright require it for people who want to boost their appetite and gain a few pounds. Just make sure you stock up on healthy snacks!

Aside from appetite loss and nausea, other conditions that KGB can treat include headaches and chronic migraines, pain, and stress. These green popcorn buds give you a giggle fit and a snacking obsession. But most of all, they can give you peace. Let yourself relax in the evening surrounded by snacks, a feeling of cerebral ease, and less pain than maybe you knew you could feel.

This is probably the only context the KGB has ever been associated with laughter. Call this the first historical revisionist cannabis.